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Our jobs as a mom or parent of a child can be difficult. I do feel like I am doing an OK job but sometimes I feel like there are areas I need to improve on. It’s ok to improve our parenting skills. Being a parent is a part of adapting and changing, going with the flow.
Just because you need to stop things as a mom doesn’t mean you’re a terrible parent. Actually, the fact that you want to change and do better means you’re an AMAZING parent! Good for you, mama!
There are some things I know I do that needs to go, now! I have learned quite a bit since being a mom for almost 11 years. Here are some things you should stop doing as a mom.
Stop Negative Self-Talk
Seriously, I am the worst at this!! I am always talking about how bad I am at math or how I can’t do certain things because I’m not skilled enough or know enough.
What is this teaching my children? That they aren’t smart enough? My daughter brings home her math homework and needs help but I am always complaining about how I have no idea how they do things anymore.
We need to stop doing this as a mom. At least put in some effort and try to learn math along with them so you can help as best as you can. This shows your children that you’re willing to put in the hard work even though you’re not totally sure how it’s done.
Stop With The Stress Talk
It’s ok to be stressed out. Heaven knows I am stressed. I’ve got three kids, I work as a nurse, and I am currently doing my Bachelors degree online. I am busy and I am stressed.
Most of the time, I am saying how much I have on my plate and how stressed out I am. I feel overwhelmed and over-worked. So, how does this look to my children? We need to stop doing this as a mom.
Stress is a normal part of ur lives but it’s the way we deal with the stress that matters. How are you coming off to your children? Do you want them to feel stressed out all the time? Constantly worried? I know I don’t want this for my children. It’s better to be positive about the stress rather than negative. For example, I could say something like, “I am going to be so smart after I’m done with my Bachelor’s program.”
This positive attitude shows them that yes, school can be tough but hard work will pay off in the end. This attitude also relates to other aspects of life, like chores, making new friends, or learning something new.
I’ve been trying really hard with this and I even started a gratitude journal for it. Every day, I write about something I am grateful for. It can be simple like running water or my bed.
I’ve been struggling with my middle child and his ungrateful attitude. If he does something he wants to do, he always wants more. Nothing is enough for him. We made him start writing down things he is grateful for.
He definitely still struggles with this but we are working on it. It will help them if we are grateful for all the things we have and if we verbalize about what we’re grateful for. This will allow your child to self reflect on what they have and what they are grateful for.
It’s frustrating having an ungrateful kid who constantly wants more and nothing is ever good enough.
When I was a kid, I didn’t do much complaining. I have a hard time understanding the ungrateful mentality. Parents, we need to show our children how grateful we are for our health, our homes, our cars, our clothing, etc. We can’t complain or they will think they can complain too.
Kids need to learn this early on because as they get older, they are going to be very difficult for you. Get rid of the entitled attitude now if you can see it in your child!
Get Off Your Phones
I’m guilty of this and I feel like talking about will help me to be better and hold myself accountable. I like scrolling Facebook or my new obsession is watching make-up tutorials. Our children are watching us and see how we’re obsessed with electronics.
My kids are electronic lovers also and it drives me nuts. Moms, we need to stop doing this so our kids can learn by example. If we tell them to get off the electronics but we can’t let go of it then why should they? We are being hypocrites and they can see that.
I’m trying to stay off my phone and focus more on other things that I need to. I can save the scrolling and videos later in the evening or at night when my kids are in bed.
Stop Body Shaming
One more important one I almost forgot about is body shaming. Why do we do this to ourselves? I do it and I’m not denying it. I say things like, “my stomach looks awful”, or “childbirth ruined my body.” Instead, we can turn it around and say, “I love my mom stripes because it meant I got to have you.” This would sound a lot better to them.
Being positive about our bodies allows them the opportunity to be positive about their own bodies. They don’t need to worry about that stuff at a young age and we need to stop doing this as a mom.
Our children have enough to deal with going to school and peer pressure let’s not add body shaming to the mix as well. They should grow up being comfortable in their own skin. So, next time you go swimming, wear your swimsuit proudly and have fun with your kids. They literally don’t care what you look like but only want you there with them having fun.
There you have my top 5 things you should stop doing as a mom. Do you have any others to add to this list? I would love to hear it below in the comments.