Last Updated on
Does your child have a hard time with anger management?
When a child is frustrated or angry, their emotions can turn into rage quickly if it isn’t handled. At times, the rage can turn into physical harming of others. I for one hate it when my kids fight and hit each other in anger.
There are some ways to help anger management for your children if it is needed.
It doesn’t mean you will turn your children into perfect little angels but it definitely will give you a starting point.
Be A Good Example For Your Children
I can learn a thing or two from this. I am definitely not perfect here. There are times when I yell because I get angry and lose it.
This behavior is normal, unfortunately.
If you lose your temper in front of your child, they are watching and learning how to behave when they get frustrated. Stop and think about it before exploding.
When you know your children are there with you, consciously practice how to cope with your anger in a calmer and rational way. They will pick up on this and hopefully apply it to their anger management.
Let your child know that it’s ok to feel angry but the way they handle their anger is in their control.
If you end up losing your cool and yell at your child, it’s important for you to recognize your mistake and apologize to your child so they know it’s ok to admit that you were wrong and so can they.
There is absolutely nothing bad about being wrong at times. They need to understand this at a young age.
Feeling Angry Is Different From Being Aggressive
There is a thin line between feeling angry and aggressive when it comes to your child.
My children still struggle with this and will hit if they are feeling angry with one another.
If they decide to hit their sibling, that is their choice and there need to be consequences.
You can tell when your child is about to lose it so as a part of anger management, talk to your child about the feelings they are having.
It’s easy to misunderstand feelings when you are little. Talking about feelings will help them to understand why they are angry and that way you can help them through managing it.
Talk About Limits
Look, it’s ok if your child gets angry. This is a normal part of life. However, slamming doors, yelling, hitting, and breaking things should never be tolerated in your home.
If/when something like this occurs, consequences need to be put in place.
For example, no TV or video games for a few days should nip that in the bud quickly.
If you threaten something is going to be taken away, then stick to it! Don’t backtrack then they will know they can walk all over you.
Teach Coping Skills
Anger management can be an ongoing learning project that takes time and patience. Take it from me, we’re still going through all these steps daily.
Teach your child that yelling does not solve the problem. Half the time, the yelling muffles any audible words coming out of their mouths.
Show them how to use their words instead of yelling.
I just did this today with my almost 4 year old. He was yelling at his brother for splashing water on him so I took him aside and talked to him calmly and told him what to say to his brother instead of yelling.
After I spoke with him, I splashed him again and he was about to yell but then he spoke his frustration to me and said, “please stop, I don’t like that”.
Just because he cooperated with me today does not mean he will every day. Anger management takes hard work and patience.
One thing my mother in law told me that she used when she was a younger mom is a punching “object” for frustrations.
She was fortunate enough to have ALL boys so you can imagine the amount of testosterone going around their house.
She had a pillow or a punching doll for whoever needed to get out their frustrations without hurting a sibling or breaking something valuable in the home.
Honestly, I haven’t tried this option but I am intrigued to give it a try. I don’t think it would hurt anything.
Sometimes More Help Is Needed
If none of these tips are helping you with your child then it might be time to think about getting professional help.
Only you know your own child best so you will have to decide if they need help or not.
There might be an underlying issue that can be overlooked so it’s important to pay attention to their behavior and decide what is normal and what isn’t.
Don’t be afraid of what people might think if your child needs professional anger management. If they are judging you, kick them out of your life. Who needs that!
You need to do what is best for your child and screw everyone else’s “opinions”.
I really hope my little tips on anger management for your children has helped you.
If there is anything you would like to add, please do so in the comments.